Yes this is how I feel...stuck in the endless routine of home and work, I feel frustrated now. I have nothing to look forward to every morning - nothing to keep me going. Even going for the ocassional movie is passe. My Sundays just zip past - I barely get to know when it started and when it ended. My entire morning goes in the household chores; and the rest of the day just seems too less after that to go anywhere. I need some excitement in life. I wish to join some classes - salsa or language maybe, just anything to keep the frustration at bay. As a student, I would eagerly look forward to the days when I would be standing on my own two feet - but now that I am settled professionally, and personally, I feel like there is the excitement factor lacking in my life. I have nothing to talk about. I have become a boring person - reduced to talking about mundane things like the weather, work and maid troubles.

As a result of all this, I have become very cranky and irritable I feel. I need to something to kepe me going. I am becoming impossible to live with. I blow up at the smallest of things. I love my hubby, but how long is he going to tolerate my irritation. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut, going nowhere. I enjoy my work, yes, I really enjoy it, but I need something. I feel like I'm losing myself in this endless routine life.

I have come a long way since April 2006 when I passed out of college...all set to enter the big bad world armed with 5 years of hard work and my degree. Little did I know that within 3 weeks I would meet my soulmate and marry within a year of that. And now here we are, almost at April 2008 - m with almost 2 years of work-ex and almost 1 year of marriage-ex.

Alot of people, and most of all my mother, were surprised to know that I wanted to marry a person I had met only once earlier at a dinner I was dragged to which in itself is a separate blogpost (not counting those one or two times we met when we were kids ; or rather I was a kid and he was busy being the cool dude) and had committed to the same. not that my parents had any objections, he being the son of their very old friends and we had the parents going "Aao is dosti ko hum rishtedaari mein badle"...or some such Bollywoodish line.

Anyway, people were surprised, or should I say shocked cuz all through college I was this ambitious career-oriented hard-working girl who wanted to work hard and party harder with all the cute guys around. And them envisioning me as a bride at the tender age of 23, not even completed one year of work, not having ever entered the kitchen and having committed to a lifelong relation - yes I understand the difficulty faced by people.

However, once I got to know the Hubby, and especially after the first impromptu kiss, I was sure with all my heart and soul that this was the guy for me. And we knew that the relation had to be for keeps considering the friendship of the two families; also we knew that for the very same reason we would face no opposition to our relation from either of the families. And once i was ure of the Hubby, it really didn't make sense for us to be in two different cities and neither did we see any in living together in sin when we more than happy to be married. The obvious concerns were that I was pretty immature yet in these matters. Everyone was concerned how would I cope up with managing work and home - everyone, except me that is.

I never thought about it until I actually had to do it, and when I actually had to do it, well I didn't think much about it - followed the Nike ad and 'Just did it'. On hindsight, maybe its a good thing I didn't dwell too much on how would I cope up with house and work, a new city, a new family, totally different culture etc etc. Yes no doubt it was tough, but then I had the support of the Hubby all along to hold my hand, to lend his shoulder, to give me some gyan at times, to guide me, to love me, to hold me, to eat the moti rotis and half-cooked chicken that I dished out earlier.

Yes I am still learning, but I think I have coped up pretty well to all the changes. My only apprehension was my name, and we came to a compromise at that. I write both my maiden name and my married name.

Yes things do get difficult sometimes, but then we order out for some kababs/ chilli chicken/ pizza, turn off the lights and put on a good movie and cuddle up. That makes it worth everything.

Moral of the story: If the guy is Mr. Right, then everything else is right. Just don't take years to ensure that the guy is Mr. Right, cuz if he is not, the years will slip by till you find another guy and assess whether he is your Mr. Right or not.

PS: This is is the opinion of th author; and the author does not intend that it be taken as gyaan.